Shoes and more...

So...Kylie has been bugging me for quite some time to buy her a pair of pink light up sketchers. As you can probably imagine, I was shocked when she asked for a specific brand. But like any bad mom, I was eventually suckered into getting them for her. Four years old, and already a consumer. They didn't have the pink ones in her size (she has the biggest feet EVER!) but they did have a pair of black/purple lace ups that she liked. Here is a pic of her with her new shoes on lookin' mighty stylish.
I can never get Kylie to smile (a real smile, not the cheesy one) for the camera lately. The only reason why she posed for this one was because I took it with her. So, try to ignore my face and focus on how absolutely adorable she looks =).
Here is Mr. trouble, the baby formerly known as Beckham, spilling a brand new container of puffs all over the carpet I had just finished vacuuming. And before you say anything, yes, of course I had the top on it. He somehow managed to get it off and dump every last one in the two minutes it took me to throw a dirty diaper away...grrr...Here he is again, do you see a pattern emerging? Exploring in our bathroom, finding the box of 1000 Qtips...luckily his coordination only let him pull out a couple before i found him.

And here he is yet again, this time attacking kylie's bathroom cabinets....

a weekend of celebration!

Kylie, Makenzie, and Ashlyn waiting for the band to come down the street
These three spell TROUBLE!
Love the fact that they took their dress up play outside. Makenzie is ready for a snow storm and Ky looks like she's headed to school!
Since Gary was sleeping in Ky's room, she made a bed on the floor of our bedroom. She started the night next to the night stand on the opposite wall with the door only slightly ajar. This is how she ended. Slowly she crept closer and closer so she could keep an eye on us.
To celebrate all the good news we got this week about the baby, we decided to have a fun filled weekend with some of our favorite people! Thursday night I met two very dear friends of mine from back in the old soccer days, Hayley and Amanda. It was just us girls, so it was so nice to catch up and hang out without changing diapers or wiping mouths during the meal. And I hope Amanda took only the good out of our mommy conversations, since we can't WAIT for her to get on the bandwagon!

Friday afternoon J's best friend Gary came in town to hang out with us and the kids. Friday evening my fave. people from Hudson, alright, let's be honest, the only two people I talked to, Lacy and Kyle, came over to hang out and celebrate Lacy's 30th birthday!

We started Saturday morning bright and early by heading over to Stephanie and Aaron's house to let the kids play, have breakfast, and watch the Wylie H.S. band March-a-thon that was happening in our neighborhood. The girls had fun playing dress up and hanging outside while we watched the band go by.

Saturday afternoon Emily, Josh, and of course, Cash, THE MAN, came over to hang out, play, and have some lunch. We brought the day to a close after Gary and J took both the kids to the pool so I could lay down and rest.

Sunday was filled with church, a trip to babies r us, and then some driving around to look at some areas we are interested in potentially moving to. The moving thing is very hit or miss for me. At times I am excited about the possibility of a new adventure. But, most of the time, I am tired just thinking about what a pain the process is going to be, and how hard it will be leave the friends and life we have made here (not that we'll be moving far).

Here are a few pics. Enjoy!

BLESSED

whew! Where to begin? Jason and I headed back to the doctors today for another sonogram. Neither of us said it, but I think we were both still 50/50 on if we thought this baby was going to make it. The sono tech looked around for a solid 20 minutes and in the end was amazed to see that there was NO sign of the SH they had previously seen only 4 weeks ago.

The doctor came into the exam room after that and this was the convo:

Him: So that's good news!

Me: Yeah! Really good! Really surprising!

Him: Yea, the tech said she was shocked that there was no sign of it. I'm not going to lie, I've never seen a hemorrhage as big as yours heal that fast. I mean that sucker was HUGE. I remember looking at the sono pics and thinking...wow.

I love the fact that before, what was described to me as a 'fairly moderate size' has become 'huge', but in the words of my doctor, what good would it have done to describe it that way previously when there is nothing to be done either way. Now, my doctor is a fairly awkward man, but as many of you know, I can be quite strange from time to time, so we get along quite well. I like the fact that there is no formalities and I can talk to him w/out all the crap you get from some docs.

Anyways...This is all good news. God has heard our prayers and has spread his blessings upon our family. I think it still hasn't fully hit me yet and I'm not sure when it will. Being that I'm just shy of 16 weeks, we tried to take a look at the sex, but the baby wasn't really cooperating. He/she was sitting indian style and wouldn't stop moving the entire time. There was a brief glimpse of what the tech and I both thought to be boy parts, but she said 'this early, it could have just as likely been a foot.' So we go back in another month to determine the sex and actually do all the blood work and cultures I have yet to do.

It is a good day.

We are relieved.

We are thankful.

We are humbled

We are truly blessed.

My morning, thus far, in pictures...

Discovering the dish towels. I spent the next five minutes putting them all back in the drawer.
Now this is the face of someone in trouble...
the only thing he loves playing with more than doors, is the vacuum.

caught red handed, playing with the doorstop.

So excuse me if I laugh when people ask if I'm resting...

Breathe...and have Faith.

On the move...
So, today is Monday. Wednesday is THE day. THE day we go back to the doctor. THE day we find out if there is any improvement on the baby. Up until about a week ago, I was in, what I considered, to be a pretty good spot. I had yet to make up my mind about what I thought was going to happen. I was ready to go in open to any possibility. But, as most of you know, the ability to keep yourself from your own brain only lasts so long. I have felt better in the last two weeks than I have in quite a while, well, minus the fact that I'm now getting morning sickness for the first time (but hey, I did this with Kylie too, right when you're suppose to be feeling better, I started getting sick). So now I'm in a tough spot, now...I'm getting tension migraines because I know that if I go in with an expectation, that comes with the opportunity to be let down. Now...this is all I think about. But luckily, the wait won't be too much longer. J is taking the day off so he can come with me to the docs, which, looking back is crazy. He went to EVERY apt. when I was pregnant with Kylie, and many with Beckham. Now, I'm at almost 16 weeks and he hasn't even seen the heartbeat. Much of this is because of us finding out so late, the rest, you can chalk up to being busy at work, or watching the other kids so I can go to the appointments in peace. So, not denying it any longer...I'm hoping, might I say expecting?, good news in two days, or AT LEAST not bad news. And I KNOW this sets me up for a potentially horrible day if I am wrong, but we think what we think, and now, all I can do is breathe...and have faith.

On much lighter notes, Beck is finally crawling, albeit a very slow, fairly unproductive crawl. But I think he's liking it. So far, he's discovered the door stops (super annoying, but inevitable, I know) and the entertainment center. Yesterday, he crawled over to the entertainment center doors and sat and cried for 10 minutes because the doors were closed and thus, he couldn't play inside. My response? tough cookie, get over it. The nice part about the crawling? Since he's been on the move, he's consistently sleeping through the night, something we haven't seen since he was much younger.

Kylie started Jumpstart today at her school. New class, new teachers. THE LAST class between her and kindergarten next year (An absolutely CRAZY thought)! She's so over the patch wearing, as are Jason and I, and I think we're all ready for her appointment where she will be retested to see if the patch has done what it is suppose to do. Fingers crossed that this will be the end of the eye dilemmas we've faced as of late.

Virginia Beach

This past week we had the honor of heading out to the beach to help Matt and Lindsay celebrate getting married. Jason was in the wedding, and since we were going to make the trip, we decided to go ahead and make it a family vacation as well. (we'll take any opportunity to hang out at the beach). J's parents met us there (thank goodness! not sure how I would have done it if not for their help), and we spent as much time as we could on the ocean.

Kylie was in absolute heaven. It was like pulling teeth anytime I had to get her headed back to the condo to eat a meal, and although Beck wasn't the biggest fan of the water (it was pretty chilly for him) he really enjoyed just chillin' in the stroller and watching all the action.

I could go on forever about what we did, but the short version is this...I think the only one who wanted to go home at the end of the six days was Jason (and that ONLY because he was exhausted). The trip reaffirmed what we already know...at some point in time...this family WILL live near the ocean, nothing feels more right than that. Here are a couple pics from the trip (we took over 200) and I hope to post more when we get the ones from J's rents.

Congrats to Matt and Linsdsay and thanks SO much for letting us take part in your amazing wedding weekend.

Kylie being the amazing big sister she is, playing with Beckham in the 'pool' Jason made.
Checkin' out the sand

Kylie writing her name in the sand
I had so much fun with her on the beach. we spent hours picking up shells, playing 'turtle', and burying each other.

Kylie with the bride and groom
group shot...Beck and I didn't make it to the reception. He, or rather his naps, did not cooperate.

What a BEAUTIFUL bride

Rehearsal dinner off the water...at an oyster bar =)
racing the waves up to the shore


the boys
boys out on the town
golfing
beck's first trip in an airplane. he did pretty well all things considered. flirted with the flight attendants most of the time.

Stir crazy...

So we're five days into this 'pelvic rest' stuff, and I'm going crazy!! I'll spare you all the little details and just touch on a couple of the things that have been making its way through my mind time and time again...

1. For starters, I feel super guilty. I have one of the most amazing husbands in the world, who goes from the moment he gets up, to the moment he lays down at night. He cooks, helps clean, helps a TON with the kids, and is sure to take care of me also. And although I'll be the first to admit that he does much more around here than I do (darn energy level =))...I still find time to keep the house tidy during the week, do the laundry, etc. Now, with this rest thing...all that has come to a stop. When Beck naps, I sit, no questions about it. The other night J asked how he's suppose to find the time to add more things that need to be done around here...and although he didn't pose it in an accusational kind of way(he really needed help figuring it out) I freaked out...truth is, I don't know how he's going to find the time...and I feel guilty that I'm home and can't do the little bit I do on a regular basis.

2. My clothes don't fit, and for some reason I'm still refusing to shop maternity...I did find my waist 'be band' that I never threw out, although I did manage to sell and donate ALL of my maternity clothes from previous pregnancies. I'm hoping the band will get me through the rest of the summer, and I guess at some point, i'll have to give in and get a couple items to get me through fall and winter.

3. There are times, albeit the rare emotional ones, when I get frustrated at Beck because he needs so much and if I had more time, I could give this baby and the sac more time to heal. Then, there are times when I'm frustrated at the baby, because it is keeping me from fully enjoying my little man that I LOVE so dearly. And then I catch myself thinking one of these thoughts, and feel guilty that such thoughts are even going through my head...what kind of a mom am I???

All in all, We're doing what we can. Little changes have been made that I think are giving me the best chance. I've stopped changing Beck on the floor, to avoid lifting him up and down that far, that often. I'm now just running Ky into school and someone else is walking her to class, instead of having to get Beck in and out of the car another time. Beck eats most of his snacks on the floor now (not worth getting him to the high chair). I say this with all the conviction in the world, I have NO IDEA how mommy's on bed rest do it!!!

I'll end this post with the most frustrating part of all of this...poop. I know what you're thinking, let me explain. Pregnancy for me, consists of this major sensitivity to smells (never had this with Ky, but a ton when I was pregnant with Beck) and now I find myself developing the same issue. Last week, Kylie had a stomach ache, I went to go check on her in the bathroom and started dry heaving the minute I walked in. I couldn't even stay to help. This morning, Beck decided to poop three times....maybe this is payback for making him a middle child? Anyways, I had to plug my nose with a hair clippy and force myself to change it. Long story short...it is going to be a very long six months.

We go back to the doctor on the 25th for another ultrasound. And although I still haven't developed a gut feeling as to what I think will happen, I feel confident that we are currently doing what we can. Jason did all the Beck lifting this weekend, I didn't lift him once. And I noticed that I have cramped less in the last two days than I have in weeks. Now, I'm not a doctor, but I would have to imagine that this is a good sign...